Friday, December 30, 2011

Goodbye Extensions

Friends, Romans, Blogger followers, lend me your ears (Shakespeare no?). I bring to thee a scenario that some may know well: that goodbye with a good friend that lasts a while longer than any goodbye ever has before it.

Example. This evening I was supposed to leave a rather Quimsical person's home at around six-thirty. I actually departed at eight-thirty. Now we didn't spend all that time goodbying, but I would say we spent a good fifteen minutes. And we did it in accent I thank you.

You see accents are a key component of a long goodbye because in order to extend the goodbye to its full potential you must pretend to be someone else. Someone who leads a much more dramatic life than you do. Someone who has much more at stake when they say goodbye.

Confused? Want to know how to extend your own goodbyes so you leave a full fifteen minutes to half hour later than you're supposed to? I'll give you some tips... because I''m just that generous.

1) Begin in a ridiculous dramatic pose on your car. I like to lay on top of mine with a melodramatic facial expression.

2) Never get in your car and never allow the other person to get in their's. Getting in the car is 75% of the leaving.

3) As said earlier, speak in accent. My accent this evening was a sudo-Catherine Hepburn. These accents should not be spot on either, they're your own personal creation.

4) The goodbye leaves the real world, the reason for your goodbye is no longer the actual reason for your goodbye. Remember, much more dramatic than your actual life.

Just as a disclaimer, other people will probably see you do this, but fret not. You will inevitably see yourself from afar, running about and flinging yourself dramatically on cars, but just know that what you're doing isn't normal but it is fun :)

Happy New Year

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